:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
