I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Randomize