I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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