this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
