Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
we're chasing vodka with high fives
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
