I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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