Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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