you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize