how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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