I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
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