How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize