Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
