Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize