she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
21 Guys Share Their Insane Stripper Stories
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
27 Reasons Why Men Need To Moan More During Sex
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.