Got a toothbrush?
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
well you can't waste a boner
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
