I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
You can't just leave with hair like that
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
