I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize