We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
