Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
