But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
