I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
