Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
