Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
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i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
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1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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