im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
