Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
