Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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