I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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