Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
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