just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
either way he was missing a nipple.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
