If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
one might say we're banned from that church
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize