doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
