So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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