and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
