so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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