i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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