belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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