dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I just want to make out with him forever
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
