PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
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That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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