dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
