He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
