you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
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i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
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I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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