If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize