How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
