sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
