I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
