'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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