:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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