My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize