Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
