i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
